the way tao lin arr

mothernature.com is having a 15% off of everything sale in honor of tao lin.  use the money that you save to pre-order a tao lin collectible first edition t-shirt today –> http://reader-of-depressing-books.blogspot.com/.
today tao called and asked for “things that would make me look like a pirate.”  i put in random shit and he said that [...]

snow cones are bacteria cones

did you know that bacteria help water coalesce into 85% of snowflakes?  this bacteria can cause disease in tomato and bean plants.
tao lin can make it rain wherever he goes by throwing a cloud of tao lin bacteria into the air.  shrines have been built on organic farms to honor “storm,” who is actually tao [...]

late alarm

tao lin had asked me to call him to wake him up early so that he could arrive to where he was going “on time.”  i forgot.  in penitence, i brought him a grocery-cart full of organic oranges and piled them up in a pyramid in front of his door.  in the middle of the [...]

open street for orphans

today tao lin called and asked me if i would watch his door for him while he was gone.  i said, “okay” and sat by his door.
there was a ladybug, orange with black spots, that crawled in front of my feet.  it must have been lost.  it must have been looking for aphids that were [...]

SWEET BABY HEYZEUS

tao lin’s new poetry book, “cognitive-behavioral therapy” is “coming out” in may 2008.
the little kids go “eeeee eee eeee” when they hear that tao lin’s new poetry book, “cognitive-behavioral therapy” is coming out in may 2008. they also shake their hands “oh goodie,” like wallace does, when they say “eeeee eee eeee.”
when asked what [...]

being a disowned intern feels the same as being a non-disowned intern

it’s like when you wake up for your birthday and you feel the same way you did at 11:59.99 pm the previous day.
actually, it feels better.  you can feel “badass” because you got disowned.  also, we still get paid.
tao lin didn’t forget that –>
“internships are ‘for life,’ i may ‘call upon you’ thirty years from [...]

stevia leaf

ahhh i feel good.
today it rained really hard only as i was walking to class. it felt nice since it wasn’t windy. i also liked the novelty of arriving to a seminar and being the only one wet. there’s a cute guy in my class that says intelligent things; sometimes we have mock [...]